There are times that we don’t enjoy certain conversations, not because the subject is uninteresting but because my chat member challenges me too much. Naturally, we enjoy conversations where at the end it, we manage to impress our viewpoint and feel more right after that. But on the hind sight, such ‘successful conversation’ doesn’t make us better. We gain more confidence no doubt, but we don’t expand our horizon.
On the contrary, when we are challenged by our friends, when they challenge the very sacred truth we hold, it is actually a true test of our conviction.
If we are thinking of how to improve ourselves, this is it. In such a situation, we need to use up all that we know, all that we understand to defend our position. Through it all, we either reinforce our belief or we expand our understanding. Whichever the case, we benefit although during the conversation, it is an agony.
If we take a step back, ask ourselves why are we so agitated when our belief is challenged or questioned. If we have so much conviction, what can change that belief and hence why the agitation when we are questioned? In my opinion, it's because of the fear of the unknown. "What happens if he is right?", "How can I be wrong when I experienced it myself?" Simply put, we are worried subconsciously that if this sacred cow is shattered, then we may be lost or we may need to re-engineer the truth from the scratch. We will have sleepless nights, we will try to salvage that past truth, we will...naturally, the mind will say 'defend yourself from the challenge', 'avoid this trouble-maker'...
Do you have such friends that don’t hesitate to challenge you? Don’t sack all of them as they do play a role.
